Wednesday, 25 July 2012

Inconsiderate Malaysians

Thanks for all the comments on rude Malaysians. I do agree, we can rid of most of the problems if we have strict enforcement and no bribing, much like Singapore. That will certainly cure the bad behaviour but it does not change the very make up of the person. 


Malaysians are generally the nicest people when you go to their homes, they make you feel welcomed. They offer you drinks and food even though you have obviously just eaten. They are the most gracious hosts. If you come into my circle of intimacy or closeness, be they family, friends of my kids, friends of my family ... and I have been introduced to you - we certainly treat you much better.


One of the issues lie with our neighbourliness. We sometimes rubbish some Western society for being overly friendly in striking up conversations with strangers, we seemed averse to bid a smile and wave to our neighbours even when we do not know them. Why is that? I believe Malaysians back in the 50s and 60s were much friendlier, yes, small towns even now are much much friendlier. There is more compassion, empathy ... in smaller towns you kinda know everybody or they would be somebody who knows somebody you know- hence the better behaviour? 


Cities are impersonal and cruel. Cynicism is rife, we tend to be too cautious. Naturally, our very bad crime rate causes us to be extremely wary of scams, strangers ... everyone thinking the worse of whomever they they come across. 


However, many of the rude behaviour cited in the previous posting was not due to the above reasoning. Its plain selfishness, its pure "what I can get away with mentality". First, lack of punishment and enforcement, we take our chances, chances of getting caught or fined is so remote. We cannot really take the law into our hands and smash the windows of the double parkers, can we, then its two wrongs. 


People in L.A. behave better, but not because they are nicer, its because if you anger some motorist, they could have a gun in their glove box and we know what could happen next. Fear is certainly not the way to go.


It all goes back to how we were brought up. If you have kids in the car and they see you double park, tailgate or road hog ... what do you think they will learn? The bad behaviour is all a reflection of bad parenting mainly, or rather ineffective parenting. Some parents will say ... well, friends' influence is also important when they get to their teens. Every layer shoulders some blame I guess. 


There is not enough peer pressure from the 'good guys'. I mean when someone does not give up their seat for the elderly or pregnant woman, there has to be sufficient "peer pressure" from the good guys around that fucker that would cause him/her to do so. But we fear we get ourselves into trouble.


Its the same mentality that has driven us to doom in politics, but when enough 'good people' do something, we get Bersih. If we see someone doing the "right stuff", stand up alongside that person, to let him/her know he/she is not alone. Power in  numbers. No point just whining and bitching, do you stand up with your fellow man? The "bad ones" may threaten one good guy, but not when a few more just step up and join forces. We must reward good behaviour to encourage good behaviour. We cannot stand by the side and then whine and complain.


Why is a person considerate? Being nice is a fucking burden in a soul-less city. But we try to be considerate because its the right thing to do, because you know if everyone does not do likewise, we will have anarchy. Good social behaviour has a lot to do with ethics, or rather self-imposed ethics. That kind of behaviour will translate to other aspects of society and economy.


I don't think I am exaggerating when I say, the proliferation of bad behaviour socially is but a reflection of similar bad behaviour in politics, in the boardroom, in the corporate world, even in personal relationships, in some lawyers or accounting offices, in HR, in the police force, in the legal system, etc... 


Fuckers using mobile phones in cinemas .... they are probably the same kids that parents allow them to do texting n play games on their phones 99% of the time when they are dining out with their parents. 


Are you a good person? What is a good person? Have a heart, have a decent heart, empathise ... You are not a good person just because you don't steal, kill or maim. You do not have a decent heart when you only are nice when it suits you.

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